Personal giving - receiving assistance from others graciously

This article by Derek Stockley provides insight into the importance of giving and receiving advice or help from others.

It is amazing how some things come together

This is the third in a series of articles about giving. The other two are personal endeavour and personal contributions.

The genesis for this article has been building for some time. It is now a logical follow-on to the previous two articles which were both prompted by personal events.

A different view on the joy of giving

The following is an excerpt from a newsletter published on 20 December 2005 by Robert Middleton of Action Plan Marketing.

"The best I've been able to figure out is that people want, more than anything else, to make a difference, to make a contribution to others (family, friends, clients, anyone and everyone).

In other words, to give fully of ourselves. But what can we give that will make that difference? What will make the biggest possible contribution to others?

If you get this one, you not only get to fulfill your greatest desire but the greatest desire of others. And the best thing about it is that it costs nothing, takes little time, and has long-lasting benefits. It works any time and in any place.

The funny thing is that we have a terrible time giving it.

And no, it's not love, compassion, friendship, etc. Those are wonderful gifts as well. But they are not the ultimate contribution. They really pale in comparison.

And one of the saddest things is that if you fail to give this you can trigger a lot of misery, resentment, frustration and misunderstanding. The inability to give this causes alienation, divorce and wars. And yet it's so simple to give.

Are you ready for the answer?

The greatest contribution

you can make to another

is to let them contribute...

to YOU.

Since what we want most of all is to contribute, if you fully receive that contribution (whatever it is), you're making the ultimate contribution to another.

When someone wants to help you - let them. When you get a compliment - receive it graciously. When someone has an idea or resource for you - show your thanks. Whenever a loved one tries to share something with you - listen attentively.

When you accept a contribution, another wonderful thing happens - you pave the way for more contributions. It can be a never-ending upward spiral. And it feels wonderful.

Now don't mess this up by waiting for others to accept your contributions with open arms. They might not. Turn it around. Put your attention on accepting their contributions in the most expansive way you can imagine."

Conclusion

When I first read Robert’s article, I thought it made a good point. As events transpired (see: personal contributions), I further thought it made a lot of sense.

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Derek Stockley - Human Resources Development and Performance Management Consultant

Chirnside Park, Melbourne, Victoria, Australia